Sunday, June 28, 2015

My Dear BoB

“I love BoB!” she’d always gush. “But please don’t come… I don’t want it to fill up with Logos teachers.”

My housemate Erin had joined a house church, invited by the Truex family, whose three kids attended our school. They and several other families from their organization had started meeting each Sunday afternoon for Bible study, prayer, and worship. They’d named the church BoB – Body of Believers, a pun on the name of the pastor, Bob Butler. (He resisted the name choice for a while, but in vain.) Most of them were attending a Khmer-language church in the mornings, which was a great ministry opportunity but not fulfilling their desire for community and heart-to-heart conversation. They wanted a place to worship God in their own “heart language” and apply the Bible to their own lives, not just the very different-looking lifestyles of their Cambodian friends.

Erin was delighted to join BoB. Her own church was struggling and dwindling since its pastor had returned to his home country several months earlier. Like all of us at Logos, she didn’t know enough Khmer to get much out of a Khmer-language church service, and like most of us, she was growing frustrated with the time it took to travel across town to and from other international English-speaking churches. (Logos is on the northern edge of Phnom Penh, while most English churches are pretty far south.) The most popular alternative was Shalom, a church that met at our school, where we already spent 60 hours a week. Erin was finding it hard to build friendships with people outside of school, which is why she loved the welcoming community at BoB… and why she didn’t want her housemates tagging along. Could you blame her? There were a lot of us Logos teachers, and we did nearly everything together. She knew it would change the dynamic if too many of us traipsed in.

We respected her wishes, but listened longingly to her stories of intergenerational community and thought-provoking conversations and pot lucks with rare-in-Phnom-Penh comfort foods like 7-layer nacho dip. And about six months later, when she moved back to the US, several of us descended upon BoB. My own decision was simplified because my friend Sarah and I were sharing a moto, and she wanted to attend there. Soon Sarah and I loved it as much as Erin had, and new teachers Lisa Hines and the Ketchum family also made it their church home. The nine of us increased attendance by about 1/3 and strained the seating limits in Bob and Vickie’s living room, but we were warmly welcomed just as Erin had been. The church continued to grow to about 40 people.

At the Truexes' for a Thanksgiving pot luck, November 2013
Though I already had awesome community at Logos, BoB gained a unique place in my heart. The testimonies were a big part of it. Each week, people shared praise reports and prayer requests from their lives and ministries. Many BoB members were working at Mercy Medical Center, a Christian hospital providing cheap/free care for desperate Cambodians from all over the nation. They had spellbinding stories of medical crises, spiritual warfare (ex. a demon-possessed woman screaming in their parking lot until Cambodian staff prayed for her), and follow-up visits to patients’ home villages. Several others were teaching English to Cambodian university students, while a few were helping with a children’s home. I loved hearing about God’s work in Cambodia beyond Logos, and praying about this work helped unite us. We had a neat opportunity to experience the Mercy Medical Center ministry firsthand when we helped their Cambodian co-workers paint their new home - what a beautiful, joyful family

Meeting two of the sisters whose home we helped paint
The Ketchum girls and their dad
I also enjoyed the interactive teaching time. Bob, our pastor, usually preached through a book of the Bible, and while he prepared a sermon and gave us an outline for notes, he also invited our comments and questions throughout it. Since a number of members had attended seminary, they often brought extra information and knowledgeable perspectives to the discussion, as well as stories of their experiences with the principles in each passage. It was also great to discuss how the passage related to our current lives. We had members from the Netherlands, Korea, Canada, and Australia, as well as Americans from many states and theological backgrounds. Through their stories, I learned about Khmer slang, the classical music scene in Switzerland, a California cult in the 1960's, and women's sports in Israel. The sermons were great on their own, but the discussion portion really helped make each passage real to me. There was a lot of laughter, too.

Probably my sweetest, most profound memories from BoB relate to suffering. BoB members have seen a lot of it in the last few years... not just the normal stresses and heartache of living in another country, but specifically medical issues. The Truexes, who originally invited Erin and the rest of us, watched their oldest daughter Marianne suffer crippling pain due to endometriosis. As surgery after surgery, doctor after doctor, failed to offer relief, they made the agonizing decision to wrench her away from her last semester at Logos and uproot their whole family to return to the US, uncertain it would improve her condition. We laid hands on her and them before their return, crying out to God to heal her. To the doctors’ surprise, she did indeed vastly improve in the US, and today is thriving in nursing school. (The other Truexes are now back in Cambodia.) Lisa Hines suffered unexplicable chronic pain in her wrist and ankles, eventually receiving a diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis – not an easy realization for someone in her early ‘30s, and not easy to treat in Cambodia. I am in awe of her patient, uncomplaining endurance. Angie Ketchum has stared cancer in the face three times in the last three years, and we at BoB have done our best to support her and her family, amazed each time by the steadfast faith and love on display in their lives. Praying for each of these situations, time after time, has knit our church community together.

At the Butlers' house as usual, May 2014

Like any international church in Cambodia, ours has been a transient community, with many tearful goodbyes. Some people have been in Cambodia only a year; others for more than a decade. But despite the uncertainty of who would be around the following year, we acted like a family. Last fall, Bob and Vickie were wrested away from their ministry and their three foster daughters in Cambodia when Vickie’s father-in-law passed away rather suddenly last fall, leaving her mother on her own with severe dementia. Several other core members had left or were on their way out of town for various reasons. Attendance had already dwindled to about 20, and only ten - all Logos teachers - would be left in Phnom Penh by January. We prepared a Christmas party at my house as our last hurrah, this time with the Butlers at the center of our prayers. “It's been wonderful,” we all agreed, “but this season is coming to a close.”


Then the Ketchums approached the four single girls. “This format has worked better for us and our daughters than the bigger international churches,” they told us. “We’d like to continue meeting at home every Sunday. Care to join us?” I was initially hesitant. Only 10 of us? No pastor? Was that really a church? But like two of the other girls, I knew I was leaving in June, and I didn't have the energy to start over with a new church. Plus I really love the Ketchums, and I liked the idea of meeting in their home. We all ended up accepting their offer, and what a sweet semester it's been. We've listened to various sermons online and have continued the prayer/sharing time and live worship - it helps that Ryan is one of the most talented musicians I've ever met. In this smaller context, it's been easier than ever to bring snacks to share, and we started staying for a meal each week instead of just the occasional pot luck, all of us working together to slice mangoes and flip pancakes. Plus, with just four non-family members, the Ketchum girls felt freer to chat with us, share testimonies, and pray aloud. It's been so fun getting to know them better! 

This May, Bob returned for a visit, as well as his foster daughters and another couple, Thomas and Anna Kuhlmann, who had spent the winter in the US and now lived too far south of Phnom Penh to attend most weeks. It was great exchanging stories of God's blessing in all of our lives and how the Bible had been teaching us. Bob and Vickie are now on their way to Thailand, with her mother in tow, to reach out to Khmer migrant workers there. (Unlike Cambodia, Thailand has trained medical professionals who can help care for her mom.) Bob's stories of God humbling him through the difficulties they faced in the US in order to change his mind and make him open to ministry in Thailand brought tears to my eyes. Their three foster girls, two of whom are in their 20's, are also thriving and experiencing God's provision. We all agreed - God has been good to us the last several years in Cambodia, and BoB Church has always been a great channel of God's faithfulness to us.  


By May 2015, only the most solemn BoB members were left.